and foremost, it's about having fun. It's also about publicity,
and if you're reading this, it's working. Curtis Amusements
creates and develops entertainment content, and unlike some other
outfits that claim they do too, we'll actually try to entertain
you while you visit our website (not just throw a bit of sliding text and
a blaring tune in your face and leave it at that). Feel free to explore
any of our online entertainments, and we'll do more than just offer
to entertain you, we'll do our best to deliver on that statement:
you looking for Conceptual Development services (e.g., scripting, treatments,
storyboards, conceptual artwork) for your entertainment project? Are you
looking for original Entertainment Properties? Are you looking for novel
New Media ways to reach your own audience? We invite you to MAKE
you just here looking for online amusement, adventure, and, well, entertainment...?
Then YOU are the reason why we do what we do! Welcome, and -- HAVE
really, no. While there is no "adult content" per se
on the site, we feel that most of our Viewers must be at least in their
late teens-and up to fully
enjoy our style of humor and the majority of the content we present here.
any Visitor (of any age) objects to topless mermaids, cocktail
humor, gallows humor, twisted literary humor, cartoon bloodletting, unabashed
cheesecake, animated explosions, bizarre wildlife, macabre or oddball imagery,
and anything else like this stuff, then they are kindly requested to PLEASE
used to be a bunch of lengthy stuff here about other browsers' various
degrees of compatibility, but, in a nutshell, just use Google's Chrome
Browser if you're on a Windows system, and the Safari
Browser if you're on a Mac, and the site should display properly on most
something doesn't seem to be playing right for you after the page appears
to have fully downloaded, try using your browser's "Refresh" button
to reload the page. This may help properly
download any missing elements. The more basic site elements are cached,
the more enjoyable your explorations should be.
DOES MY "BACK BUTTON" WORK SOMETIMES, AND NOT OTHERS?
of our entertainment environment pages are built with invisibly stacked
"layers", which you are actually showing and hiding as you explore.
Often when your view of a virtual location changes, you're not "leaving"
that page, but rather "going deeper" into its layers.
For this reason, it's best to use the "Navigation Bar's" directional
pointers at the screen bottom, when they're visible. If you
have difficulty "going back" to a previous view in that location,
try using your browser's "refresh button" to reload that page.
possibility is that your browser is not allowing the interactive layer control
script to function. Check out the Browser Compatibility&
Updates section above, and see if the browser you're using to view the
site is recommended, or may require an add-on (-like Firefox does-) to properly
control our site's navigation features.
CAN I TURN OFF THAT LITTLE TOOLBAR 'DOO-DAD' THAT KEEPS POPPING UP WHEN
I HOVER OVER THE PICTURES?
we hate that thing too. On PC's to turn off the "Image Toolbar",
follow this path:
to your browser's 'TOOLS' MENU > Click 'INTERNET OPTIONS' > Choose
the ADVANCED Tab > and, under MULTIMEDIA > CLEAR (UN-Check ) the
'ENABLE IMAGE TOOLBAR' Check Box.
disable the Image Toolbar directly from the web page, hover over any image
larger than 200x200 pixels (which will bring up the blasted little thing),
and RIGHT CLICK on the Toolbar, then click "Disable Image Toolbar".
we insist on earning the trust of our Visitors.
of the virtual locations on our site offer souvenir features (most of them
free) like posters or wallpaper f'rinstance, that are presented in "pop-up"
windows, so the visitor can acquire them without leaving that location.
We must be trusted not to include spyware in our pop-up windows or our available
immersive entertainment environments require Active X controls to play the
wide varieties of interactive sounds and animations we present. We must
be trusted not to use these features to propagate malicious code or other
kinds of malware.
good reputation is important to us, and we will not take short-term advantage
of our Visitors' personal information for short term gain. We must be trusted
to be a safe place for you to visit, where you can enjoy yourself without
any worry that your activities, or your identity, are being personally monitored,
recorded, or conveyed to any unknown parties.
now utilize Google Analytics, which has somewhat modified our long-standing
"no Cookies" policy, Google avers that aside from the anonymous
statistical information they gather, they neither cull nor disclose any
personally-identifiable information about any of our Visitors. This feature
tells us how many Visitors we have worldwide, the number and frequency of
monthly visits we receive, and what sort of browsers are most commonly being
used to view our site.
being the case, we still don't want to know where you've been before you
got here, or where you go when you leave. We only care about entertaining
you while you're with us, and believe that if we don't abuse your trust
while you visit us, you just might tell your friends you had fun here.
That's what we're building our reputation on, not intrusive sneakiness.
bottom line is, we've no idea who you are personally, unless you tell us.
And even if you choose to, via our site's Contact forms, we do not share
any information about you with anyone else.
in business to entertain you, not to annoy you. If you find our entertainments
annoying, however, that is another matter, and you may wish to click HERE...
hit our "Swag" links ( "YoYo
Island's Tradin' Post" / "Crumpkin's
Pumpkins' Gift Shop" ), and buy a T-shirt already, skinflint.
Or a real poster (not one of our freebie downloads), or one of
our very nice libation mugs, or whatever. Pin up one of our ravishing
calendars someplace where it'll get seen, and help us keep our stats rising,
yes? Lord knows we only make a few pennies off the stuff after our manufacturers
cut, but we do alright. And our Sponsors (who are doing alright already)
will be very happy.
the publicity we garner from building an online entertainment presence also
helps us continue to develop business with our present and future Clients
in the entertainment industry. (Still, our latest calendars
are very nice...)
ONLY HAVE A DIAL-UP CONNECTION, CAN I STILL EXPLORE YOUR SITE?
your sake we really don't advise it. Sorry, but you'll only go crazy waiting
out the page loads. Chances are, if you're on dial-up, you've already
given up on us waiting for this page to load, and are not, in fact,
even reading this.
site really only works well for visitors with broadband connections.
a drag, we know, but on the plus side, everything's getting faster,
and will continue to do so. If you're looking in right now on,
say, a friend's broadband-equipped computer, and all you have at home is
dial-up, you might want to ask your local library if they've got broadband
(a lot of 'em have blazing speed), and dig us there. Or pick up
the tab for the brew and pizza at your friend's place.
possibility is that your browser is not allowing the interactive sound controls
to function. Please check out the Best Browsers
section above, and see if the browser you're using to view the site is recommended.
Yes indeed, we appreciate hearing from our Visitors who are willing to offer
helpful advice and constructive criticism about how we may improve our online
entertainment experiences. By all means, MAKE CONTACT
if you've got an opinion or suggestion you think we should be made aware
of, we'll be pleased to hear your input.
also invite you to contribute to our FAQs, if you're not seeing something
here you're looking for.
Visitors who frankly just don't like our content in general, please
see following Q & A. )
HATE ALL THIS, DON'T GET IT, THINK YOU'RE CRAZY, AM SUSPICIOUS OF YOUR INTENTIONS,
DON'T LIKE YOUR SOUND/MUSIC/GRAPHICS, DON'T THINK ANYTHING'S FUNNY, THINK
YOU'RE DOING EVERYTHING ALL WRONG, AM NOT ENJOYING MYSELF. WHAT SHOULD I
as the Old-Timers workin' the show would say, "If you're not
having fun, go home."
you don't like our Show, you don't have to hang around in the Tent. Sure,
we're still trying to figure out how to do a lot of the new things we're
up to, but what the heck, friend, most of it's free. The Owner
good-naturedly suggests it's a big universe, and we're sure you're likely
to find something to enjoy somewhere else in it.
If you still wish to convey any dissatisfaction you may have, please EMAIL
US HERE, or through our Receptionist
Page, and we will do our best to attend to your concern.
GUESTS WHO WISH TO RESUME HAVING FUN, MAY PLEASE CLICK